Category Archives: humor

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Lemons, Tequila, Bacon and Melons

April 12, 2018 Thursday
From: TimmyTim
To: Sassy
Sent: Thu Apr 12, 2018 at 4:03 PM
Subject: sorry i’ve been lying low
Sassy,
Sorry I have not been good at writing, but I found out last Wednesday that I will not have a job next year do to restructuring.  our department heads suck and they tried to fire them last year but they won an arbitration case, so the boss just did away with their positions.  I was part time to fill in the rest of another trainer and now she gets those classes and I’m let go!  
just like that, all the work, care, love, compassion just out the window and at my age, I will not be rehired.  My only hope is that she will look for another job and move on. 
So I’ve been on a funk and next week i am going on vacation and I’m just not into it right now.  The whole base of my life has just fell out from under me.  I hope you understand that I just did not have the energy to write to anyone.  You are the first person I have told outside of my wife.  Hopefully I’ll feel like writing more soon.
Take care with a warm compassionate but sad hug,
Tim
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From: Sassy
To: TimmyTim
Sent: Thu Apr 12, 2018 at 7:51 PM
Re: sorry i’ve been lying low
Hi T!  
Thank you for writing and telling me what is going on.  I am so sorry to hear your job news!  I was laid off once after 18 years at a law firm and I understand how devastating that is.  
Five thoughts – 
1) I am here for you no matter what.  
2) You are talented, pleasant, young-looking and smart – I have high hopes of you being able to find work. 
3) When I was laid off I looked back after 4 months and understood that it was the best thing that ever happened to me, as it allowed me to stop working 70 hours a week, have a life, be there when my church and my friend in the nursing home needed me, and have time for community projects!  I heartily wish the same for you – that you can look back and see that this was a good thing and you’re in a better situation. 
4) Take your time to grieve and be angry and silent but try to forget about it for now – Enjoy your vacation.  
5) When you get back, start telling everyone.  You never know who will know of something or someone that could help you.  
I also encourage you to look at an academic higher education job search site when you’re ready.  It aggregates job ads from universities and colleges in whatever region you pick so you can see them all at once.  Several of my friends have found good jobs through it. 
https://www.hercjobs.org/new_england/index.html
Don’t worry about me.  I am patient.  I will be happy to hear from you when you write, and try not to worry about you when I don’t.  Try not to let a Tuesday go by without being in touch?  
When you need an ear, I am here.  When you want a sexy, sassy woman to play with, please let me help you smile and forget about your troubles for a little while while your cock and I commune.  
A big hug with my strength and sassy spirit pouring into you!
-S
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From: Sassy 
To: TimmyTim
Sent: Thu Apr 12, 2018 at 8:05 PM
Subject: Lemons, Tequila, Bacon and Melons
Please see attached three strange attempts to help you smile.  ; ) ?

-S


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Take On Me

March 20, 2018 Tuesday

8:04 AM Sassy
From Sara Boynton’s Facebook page

It’s Spring! Theoretically.

https://www.facebook.com/sandraboynton/photos/a.206184542749790/1909963629038531/?type=3&theater

8:14 AM Sassy
Happy Spring!
8:15 AM Phil
Doesn’t feel like spring! Snow tonight.   Hope your day is special
8:16 AM Sassy
Yeah, telling us 10 inches tomorrow!
9:58 AM Phil
Damn!
9:08 PM Phil
Love the tumblr! Mature, curves women, love it! Gonna go play <3
9:22 PM Sassy

11:54 PM Sassy
I took another quiz.  I don’t know much about tarot cards but this sounds about right:

Everyone Has A Tarot Card That Matches Their Personality — Here’s Yours

You got: The Sun
You have a natural vibrance that draws people in. How could you not? You’re positive and optimistic, enthusiastic and warm, energetic and fun. You can be a bit arrogant and have a hard time dealing with more serious situations, but there’s no denying you can make people happy.

https://www.buzzfeed.com/annaborges/tarot-card-personality

11:56 PM Sassy
Be careful… this is one of those rabbit holes where I went to listen to one song and ended up listening to six! Each one worth a listen. Wow.  And a current version by the band who did the original!  

An Upbeat Acoustic Cover of the A-ha Song ‘Take On Me’ Performed in Gorgeous Guitar Finger Style

https://laughingsquid.com/acoustic-cover-of-a-ha-take-on-me/

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Gold Nuggets

March 8, 2018 Thursday
6:34 AM Sassy
Snowy March morning thanks to Storm Quinn!
[photo of the view out my balcony window of a gray day with the ground covered in snow]

7:05 AM Sassy
Good morning!  Still snowing!  Whee!
8:28 AM Phil
Ha! Glad I stayed home. Good morning!

8:34 AM Sassy
Snowy morning in Harvard Square

3:23 PM Sassy

The leader at this point in the Iditarod is half way to Nome! And richer for it!! #iditarod #iditarod2018

Ulsom’s long run to Iditarod rewarded with $3,000 in gold nuggets

Joar Leifseth Ulsom drives his dog team during Sunday’s restart in Willow. (Bill Roth / ADN)

“Norway’s Joar Leifseth Ulsom claimed the Iditarod’s halfway prize Wednesday night when he reached the race’s namesake checkpoint with a full team of 16 dogs.”

3:32 PM Sassy

Fun drone footage! #iditarod #iditarod2018

Watch Iditarod teams arrive and get situated in Takotna

6:12 PM Sassy


“…because our only officer able to perform the Patronus charm is off duty.”

Fun post from the Essexville MI Public Safety Department:
Earlier this morning, the Public Safety Department received a call from a concerned citizen who reported seeing a Dementor in Smith Park. This is particularly concerning since everyone knows muggles can’t see dementors and because our only officer able to perform the Patronus charm is off duty.  

Further investigation revealed it to be merely trash. 

The Ministry of Magic assures us that all dementors are accounted for at Azkaban. 

Please help us keep the City beautiful and help trash find its home.

https://www.facebook.com/EssexvilleDPS/photos/a.1577596602454823/2047697098778102/?type=3&theater

10:34 PM Sassy


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Coaster cartoon

p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 14.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000; min-height: 17.0px} p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 14.0px Helvetica; -webkit-text-stroke: #000000} span.s1 {font-kerning: none} span.Apple-tab-span {white-space:pre} January 30, 2018 Tuesday

from: Theo
to: Sassy
date: Jan 30, 2018, 4:28 AM
subject: Re: Connection

Well, weekdays are easiest for me to be free, nights need more planning as do weekend days.

As to where, all depends! We can go anywhere you want.

Oh, remember, fun! I am so smiling.

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from: Theo
to: Sassy
date: Jan 30, 2018, 8:26 AM
subject: Re: Connection

How’s Tuesday so far?

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from: Sassy
to: Theo
date: Jan 30, 2018, 9:24 AM
subject: Re: Connection

A little slippery out but super otherwise! You?

I am pondering possibilities…more later!

-S

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from: Theo
to: Sassy
date: Jan 30, 2018, 9:47 AM
subject: Re: Connection

Slippery when wet. Nice!

Pondering here also.

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from: Sassy
to: Theo
date: Jan 30, 2018, 10:10 PM
subject: Some Good Humor

Saw this on Facebook tonight and thought of you!

-S


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Fish market

November 18, 2017 Saturday

8:50 AM Sassy
Good morning kid!
11:07 AM Phil
Good morning! Bought a Vita-Mix this morning. Dude made lobster bisque and I was sold. Of course also picked up a prime rib to whip up for dinner 
Hope you feel better!
11:09 AM Sassy
What’s a Vita Mix?

I’m off to the fish monger for 3 pounds of something they can use for ceviche at the project party
I feel crappy but eh…have project things to do!
11:47 AM Phil
Vita mix is a juicer, blender
11:47 AM Sassy
aha!

1:06 PM Sassy
New Deal Fish Market in Cambridge

1:17 PM Sassy

Sign on the door at Lone Star Taco Bar Cambridge

1:20 PM Phil
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Got Warrants?

August 9, 2017 Wednesday

8:06AM Sassy
Good morning Philip!
8:15 AM Phil
Good morning! Beautiful day!
8:23 AM Sassy
Check out the Bangor Maine Police Department FB page!  Great giggles from their “Got Warrants?” post today!

https://www.facebook.com/bangormainepolice/posts/10155649053806079

6:40 PM Sassy
Dinner at East Coast Grill in Inman Square Cambridge – First time back since the Highland Kitchen team resurrected it!

My Arnold Palmer and Hubby’s mango margarita
The bar
Free pickles
Mexican street corn
Grilled avocado with beets, peaches, blood orange 
and goat milk yogurt dressing
Lumpia Shanghai – pork and shrimp spring rolls 
with pineapple sweet and sour sauce
Hubby’s sirloin steak tips with damn good fries
My East Carolina pulled pork plate
Historic Plaque on the spot of Jake and Earl’s Dixie BBQ – the first sentence is true. 🙂 
“A favorite hangout of local patriots destroyed by a regiment of British troops in the spring of 1775. 

Officially not on the Freedom Trail, it was still one of Paul Revere’s favorite stops for ‘Que on his way to Lexington and his cry can still be heard in Inman Square, “The British are coming – hide the burnt ends!”