Monthly Archives: May 2014

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Heart

Wednesday, May 22, 2013
8:08am
Good morning kid!  Pray hard for Mom – open heart surgery 10 am – 3 pm.  
Getting a cow valve and triple bypass.  
Have a wicked awesome Wednesday!
9:24am Phil
Praying! Please let me know.
9:27am
Thanks, Philip.  I thought I could compartmentalize, but it’s tough. The what-ifs are creeping in.  Bleh.
9:41am Phil
I hear you.  Have faith.  I’ll be thinking of all of you.

11:48am
I didn’t know this was a thing!
http://www.buzzfeed.com/summeranne/the-25-most-epic-cat-beards-of-all-time

9:58pm
Mom’s in ICU, doing well. Phew.
10:03pm Phil
Thank God! Thank you for letting me know.
10:06pm
I’ve been asleep since 6:30, only way to cope.
Took so much longer than they said.  I was so scared.

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SeaMan sunshine

Tuesday May 21, 2013 
TEXTS from SeaMan 
8:52 am 
From him to me
Good morning sunshine….hows mom
8:54 am 
from me to him 
Good morning!  How’re you doing? Mom is amazingly calm.  Surgery tomorrow. 
8:55 am 
from him to me
great thx…hope it goes well.
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Great doctor’s appt

Tuesday, May 21, 2013
7:49am
Good morning! Have a terrific Tuesday kid!
7:59am Phil
You too Sass!

5:37 pm
Tried another Chinese place tonight.  Food was tasty but too pricy.

 Hot & sour soup @ Changsho, Cambridge

Chicken with lotus seed, and salt & pepper shrimp 
@ Changsho, Cambridge
6:47pm
Hiya kid.  Stuck in the car, wicked thunderstorm!  
Had great doc appt!  Blood sugars good, weight down – so happy!
6:48pm Phil
Awesome! Good for you! Keep it up!

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Even more survey Q&A

May 20, 2013 Tuesday

I got an and email from Ashley Madison asking me to participate in an academic survey about online dating.  I filled it out, then volunteered to be interviewed via email and had a fun back-and-forth with the grad student running it.  If you missed the first part, click here.  The second part is here.  This is the third post.

From the grad student
To me
Sent: Tuesday, May 14, 2013 3:56 PM
Note: this is a bulk blind copied message with a follow-up question. Make sure to hit REPLY and not “reply all.”
Many women “frequently process experiences and information through discussions with cohorts.” With an OP, the ability to discuss the experience or even the man himself is severely limited or sometimes eliminated. This can leave women “feeling slightly isolated.”
Is this the situation with you? If so, can you elaborate?
How do you handle this isolation?
[her name]
Ph.D. Student, Sociology
Graduate Teaching Assistant
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From me
To the Grad Student
May 20, 2013
This is not my situation.  
I am very lucky to have plenty of people to talk to.  I can’t talk to everyone, but I have my sister, three local friends (two women and one man) and several online pals that I can talk with.  
I am also 
– in an online chat room on IRC for “cheaters” that is very supportive, 
– participate in an online forum that is a wealth of information and 
– email bloggers who write about Ashley Madison and other extra-marital adventures.  
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From: the grad student
To Me
May 14, 2013
oooh, tell me about the new guy?
1.    What are all the ways an outside partner complicates your life? 
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From me
To the grad student 
May 20, 2013
Hi!  
The new guy is a fun – my best start ever!  He asked me to lunch on our third text (usually takes at least a week or more).  We had a great hug with some groping, then a fun discussion over lunch, then a walk by the river for “dessert.”  We ended up necking like teenagers on a bench in the sunshine.  Whee!  He talked about a hotel… soon.  We’ll see!  
Q.  What are all the ways an outside partner complicates your life? 
A.  Complications

– Made me realize what I was missing on the sex front 
– Made me quieter.  I was used to yammering away but now I have to filter, which is hard, so I talk a lot less.  
– Makes me almost break in half sometimes missing him  (facet of long-distance relationship) 
– Makes me argue with myself about “cheating” even though Hubby doesn’t see it that way
– Taught me different rules about extra-marital relationships that are tough to take, that is doesn’t “go anywhere” or mean we’ll live happily  ever after.  It’s just passion and a confidante, and men never leaves their wives etc. 
– Costs money I don’t have to fly to see him, eat out, buy him presents, upgrade my phone 
– Makes my computer life way more tricky.  Have to be super-careful not to leave my screen open at work, not to email things to the wrong places or text him when his wife might see it etc. 
– Takes me longer to get things done in my regular life because I am writing to him, thinking of him, reading things looking to see if they’d be good to send him, watching p0rn to see if he might like it 
– Makes me lead a “double life” and distances me from my friends because I can’t tell them the big news in my life 
– We can’t share the big days like holidays or important family events.  I really needed him at my dad’s funeral.  There was no way he could get away to come.  He could have appeared – my family would’ve welcomed him, but he couldn’t find an excuse for a trip that his wife would buy
– We take risks that worry me.  Every time we’re in a car I wonder what would happen if we had an accident… 
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BEACH

Monday, May 20, 2013
10:49am
Good morning, kid!  Beautiful morning, headed to 80! 
I’m off work… thinking BEACH!  Have a super fine Monday!  Mwah!
3:37pm Phil
Good day!  It’s out for dinner and drinks followed by cigars and sipping tequila.  
Hope you made it to the beach!

Lazy Man’s Lobster and the Shrimp & Scallop Penne in white wine sauce with spinach and roasted sun-dried tomatoes @ Lobsta Land Restaurant!
Twin lights – tide so far out island looks twice as long!


Good Harbor Beach, Gloucester

                                                        Good Harbor Beach, Gloucester

Gloucester inlet
3:58pm
See my wall for beach and LOBSTER photos!  And a 1 minute video of the waves!

4:22pm
Wish you were here!
5:58pm Phil
Gorgeous, the beach too.  Lobster looks amazing! Glad you had a good day!

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Floral Panties

From: Rick
To: Sassy
Sent: Friday, May 10, 2013 8:33 AM
Subject: see you online…sent IM
Haven’t heard from you in a bit, so am just saying hi.
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From: Sassy
To: Rick 
Sent: Fri, 10 May 2013 08:45 AM
Subject: Re: see you online…sent IM
Hiya right back at you!  Crazy time at work… have enough for three people to do!  
Seeing your name in my inbox gave me a boost!  Thank you Rick!   
How’re things?  
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From: Rick
To: Sassy
Sent: Friday, May 10, 2013 8:47 AM
Subject: RE: see you online…sent IM
I’m doing ok.  At the main office today, though will have to make out trip out to the hinterlands to pick up something.  
Thinking of you taking advantage of me, touching me all over as you discover what I am wearing….
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Date: Fri, 10 May 2013 09:00 AM
Subject: Re: see you online…sent IM
My car is in the shop so I am stuck except for taking the bus to and from work.  Bleh.  It’s up at the dealer near you, so think good thoughts if you drive by and wave! 
I wish your errands would send you my way.  It would be fun to dash down to your car, hop in for a few moments and touch you places that a lady should not touch a man in a car parked on the street.  Might even have to unbutton buttons or unzip zippers to touch skin I am not supposed to touch.  And watch your face as I squeeze and stroke and press…. mmmm… 
 -S
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From: Rick
To: Sassy
Sent: May 10, 2013 12:07 PM
If only I knew where you worked….
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Date: Fri, 10 May 2013 12:22 PM
Subject: Re: see you online…sent IM
Oh don’t tease me… you know it’s not on your way anywhere today!  Naughty man! 
 Just for that you better tell me what color you have on over your beautiful man bulge today. 
 -S
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From: Rick
To: Sassy
Sent: May 10, 2013 3:14 PM
Not what color…what colors.
Bright floral print, holding me in tight, and would feel so nice on your hands as you touched skin, then nylon, and then found the surprise the nylon held for you.
You would enjoy it. 
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Sent: Sat, 11 May 2013 09:03 AM
Subject: Saturday sighting
Hiya Rick!  I hope you’re having a fine Saturday.  I thought I was going to be stuck in the house whining about my car in the shop, but my mom and my sister’s best friend have conspired to take me out for lunch!  
I was thinking about you being out for lunch.  Something you probably don’t so very often… but roll with it!  You sip your water, look around at the other diners.  and see a face you think you recognize.  Could it be that Sassy girl?  But you only saw her once and it was a long time ago for only a few minutes… you’re not sure.  Suddenly, the lady rises and heads toward the bathrooms.  She pauses, looking your way, points at you, then in the direction she is going.  It’s her. You’re intrigued.  It looks like she wants you to meet her by the bathroom?  
You really should not do this.  But you excuse yourself and head down the long hallway, around the corner, down the stairs… she is standing in the doorway of the ladies bathroom.  Crooking her finger at you.  Smiling her sexy smile.  You are not sure… this is risky.  You’ll talk to her for a moment and then go.  When you get close enough to speak, she takes your hand, pressed a finger to your lips, pulls you into the little room and locks the door. 
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From: Rick 
To: Sassy
Sent:  May 11, 2013 6:24 pm
Oh, you are naughty!!  
I would go, as you know I would.  How could I not when you are pull me so easily into that naughty, sassy web you weave?
Hope lunch was nice.  I spent the day watching my kids play sports; or just getting wet.  Being teased into a ladies room sounds like much, much more fun. 
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Sent: Sat, 18 May 2013 12:41 PM
Subject: Horsing around
Hiya Rick!  How are you this beautiful Saturday?  
I am off to Mom’s to watch the Preakness… thinking of you being so close by, as always wishing I could see you, touch you, tease you… mmm… 
Hugs with groping! 
-S
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From: Rick 
To: Sassy
Sent: May 18, 2013 5:47 PM
RE: Horsing around
Actually, I’m not so close by.  My father passed away unexpectedly so I’m way out West tending to things.  Hopefully I’ll be back sometime next week.  
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Sent: May 18, 2013 6:29 PM
RE: Horsing around
Oh Rick!  My deepest condolences.  I will pray for your family and you.  

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Preakness

Saturday, May 18, 2013
8:59am Phil
Happy weekend! Have a great one!
9:47am
Thanks kid!  Brunch with project peeps to talk about annual IRS filings. ZZZZ.  How was your outing  last night?
1:40pm
Gorgeous spring flowers!

Azaleas

 Daisies
 Chives
Purple beauty

4:13pm
Off to Mom’s to watch the Preakness.  Go Orb!

6:24pm
Oxbow. No triple crown this year.

7:37pm
Fried shrimp from Kelly’s Roast Beef for supper.  Yum.  You doing okay kid? 
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TGIF

TEXTS from SeaMan
5/17/13
3:06 pm to me
Hey….TGIF….how r holding up
3: 33 pm to him
Pretty quiet here.  You? 
4:06 pm to me
Quiet day…paperwork…
4:10 pm to him
We’re closing up early.  Yay!
4:15 pm to me
Nice….well deserved
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Friday funeral

Friday, May 17, 2013
7:54am
Good morning!   Happy Friday! 

No work for me.  Off to a funeral.  Hard but gotta do it.  Enjoy the day – count those blessings!

8:12am Phil
Awww, I know they are all hard. I try to count my blessings on a daily basis. Hope the day ends well.

10:28am
Says a lot about a guy that his ex-wife not only comes to his funeral, but gets up to say great things about him!

12:20 pm
Eating dumplings at Shanghai Gate.  Yum.